I Swear To You That This Was My Actual Train Of Thought
- Oh, God, he’s doing Bobby Photo Pose #2.
- (Number one is the Bobby Glower, and number three is the Bobby Point. Also, it’s really sad that not only am I not making these things up, but all of you know precisely what I’m talking about. This is kind of a weird hobby.)
- What the…?
- Is Bobby wearing rings?
- Is Bobby a jewelry guy now?
- I can no longer support Bobby if he is going to become a jewelry guy.
- Fuck, man: is he gonna pierce his ears?
- Or, worse, his ear?
- I blame John Mayer for this: he is introducing pernicious thoughts into Bobby’s head and we all know where that leads.
- Christ, I can’t deal with Bobby having a midlife crisis, especially since it should have happened 15 years ago.
- Who’s he with now?
- Is this the CEO of a yacht-renting company or something?
- Fucker’s got a perfectly diamond-shaped face, how about that?
- Now, I understand.
- That’s David Diehl, an Offensive Lineman for the New York Football Giants (ret.), who played on both recent championship teams, and now does commentary for Fox.
- Those are Super Bowl rings, and Bobby is not actually doing Bobby Pose #2; he is showing off the borrowed hardware.
- I am very glad that Bobby does not now wear massive rings, and that he has made many friends this weekend.