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I Swear To You That This Was My Actual Train Of Thought
Oh, God, he’s doing Bobby Photo Pose #2.
(Number one is the Bobby Glower, and number three is the Bobby Point. Also, it’s really sad that not only am I not making these things up, but all of you know precisely what I’m talking about. This is kind of a weird hobby.)
Is Bobby wearing rings?
Is Bobby a jewelry guy now?
I can no longer support Bobby if he is going to become a jewelry guy.
Fuck, man: is he gonna pierce his ears?
Or, worse, his ear?
I blame John Mayer for this: he is introducing pernicious thoughts into Bobby’s head and we all know where that leads.
Christ, I can’t deal with Bobby having a midlife crisis, especially since it should have happened 15 years ago.
Who’s he with now?
Is this the CEO of a yacht-renting company or something?
Fucker’s got a perfectly diamond-shaped face, how about that?
Now, I understand.
That’s David Diehl, an Offensive Lineman for the New York Football Giants (ret.), who played on both recent championship teams, and now does commentary for Fox.
Those are Super Bowl rings, and Bobby is not actually doing Bobby Pose #2; he is showing off the borrowed hardware.
I am very glad that Bobby does not now wear massive rings, and that he has made many friends this weekend.