Boob Tube

by thoughtsonthedead

benjy phish innertubes
The ocean bubbled and burbled and gurgled and fizzed; the clouds looked like a fisherman’s hat. The tide hiccupped, and the waves missed a beat. Gulls began to pray in Swahili.

There were no more tacos, which is almost impossible in Mexico; that is where the delicious treat is harvested in the taco fields of Oaxaca. In the spring, when the tacos bloom, you can hardly see the sky for the salsa.

But, there were no more tacos.

Three days ago, a cargo ship named the Demeter ran aground outside of Cozumel. A large, hairy, wolf-like creature was seen leaping from the craft; there was no sign of any crew aboard, and the only items the ship was carrying was several boxes full of soil and some Disco Biscuit CDs.

Bradley Cooper sensed a presence he’d not felt since…Coachella.

Americans take beaches, goddammit, and Benjy Eisen is a goddamned American.