Walk In The Sunshine
–rocking out with their co…excuse me. Please don’t interrupt breaking news.
It’s not news if you make it up.
Fine. This map shows how much of the sun’s energy it would take to power the planet. If you could capture just the electrons and photons and whatnot our beautiful sun throws at us in those spots–which in real life, of course, are hundreds of miles square–you would have enough juice for everyone. The geographically inclined will note that the dots are located in deserts, and not minor-league deserts, either: those are the big ones. I’ve been in one of those dots and it was an awful place that was actively trying to kill me the entire time I was there; I say we pave the dots with disco balls and suck up that solar milk like a kitty who moved to LA to be a star and is now doing kitty porn to pay the rent. (Do not say the phrase “kitty porn” out loud in public, just to be safe.)
The Mojave, the Atacama, the Sahara, the Arabian, the Gobi, and Australia: these are hells on Earth and building the infrastructure would cost exponentially more than the Moon Landing, but we are digging wells when it rains every day.
Let’s just put out buckets.