Healthy As A Horse
by thoughtsonthedead
Hey, Phil. Whatcha doing?
“What I love.”
Yeah. Nice to see you, buddy.
“You can call me Phil.”
Does your shirt have a horsey on it?
“A patriotic one, yes.”
Is the sweatband under—
“We’re done.”
–the cuff?
…
Phil?
“What?”
Glad you’re back.
“Hell, me too.”
Want a laugh?
“I think I deserve one, yeah.”
“That Mayer?”
Yeah.
“Jesus, it’s a casino fire over there.”
…
“You think he knows Mickey’s gonna steal it?”
Nope.
“Heh.”
Thoughts on the Dead 
That thing, probably cost plenty, but there’s something inherently wrong with it.
The sweater, cardigan, or whatchamacallit.
Maybe it was made from recycled sweat bands.
The 4 are gonna be in the Brier this year. Phil’s gonna Skip.
You’re going to force my hand on enacting strict anti-Canadian laws.
Sweet bulletproof vest sweater bro.
This post is on fire. That was really good.
Thank you kindly.
Phil’s rodeo-wear brings to mind the troubling fact that he recently told a certain reporter that nowadays he mostly listens to Brad Paisley.
He must have been joking about.
He really wasn’t. Check Nick’s piece. Always made me wonder.
I am fighting with the great writer nick Paumgarten. He has not publicly called me a genius in months.
Too bad for you his last name’s not Macarthur. When those folks call you a genius you can get a new condo.
You know how to hurt a guy.
Is that a Gangsta stealie with a bullet hole in the forehead?
Looks like he still has the hospital wristband on
Pics from a while ago.
Ah, well he must’ve been out clubbing then