Things I Have Coughed Up This Weekend

by thoughtsonthedead

  • Loogies.
  • Oysters.
  • Phlegm
  • The bright yellow things with the little black flecks in them.
  • Shmockles.
  • Tzitzies.
  • More phlegm.
  • An orange thumbtack.
  • Bitumen.

You did not expel a thumbtack, and bitumen is coal.

But it sounds like something you hock up: biTOOmin!

It does, yes, but either get back to things or stop stalling.

I am genuinely ill.

I agree with that, but not in the way you want me to.