A Final Thought On The Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame

by thoughtsonthedead

People are sensitive about the bands they like. It shouldn’t matter to reasonable people, and we tell ourselves to behave, but when someone talks shit about your favorite record, it hurts. Harsh comments are left and Unfollow is pressed: rock and roll fans behave, when pushed, in exactly the same manner as Beliebers and Lovatics and Swifties and the Beygency and it is pathetic that those are all the actual names and I didn’t have to look any of them up. (If Demi Lovato’s fans were more clever, they would call themselves Demiotics, but they are not clever because they are thirteen.) It is a bad idea to mock other people’s favorite musicians.

Reading through some of the comments and looking at some articles about the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, I was going to go through the list of inductees and make arguments, one way or the other, but I’d rather throw myself off a building onto another, sharper, building. But also the “not hurting people’s’ feelings” thing because I would inevitably be cruel about Lynyrd Synyrd. (If only there had been a good plane crash with a gun present.)

I used to manage a comic book store, so I’m used to pointless arguments, but two seconds spent in defense of one band or another vis-a-vis the Hall is five seconds wasted. This is an institution–I remind you once again–that has inducted Eric Clapton three times. Ray Charles only got one invitation, but Eric Clapton merited three separate swanky parties to celebrate how well he could play a Pentatonic scale and be the least interesting member of every single group he was part of.

And there you have it, kinda. Any argument even remotely concerning the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame can be met with that fact.

“N.W.A. deserves to be in.”

They inducted Eric Clapton thrice: these people’s opinions do not matter.

“Pop stars don’t get enough respect.”

As a Yardbird, as a Cream, and as a solo artist: three gala nights to glory in the wonder that is a guitarist who believes scales have five notes in them. Therefore, we can discount it as an arbiter of anything.

“Punk/Rap/Funk/Folk/Dubstep isn’t well-represented.”

You’re right. This is because Eric Clapton is taking their spots.

“Where are the Dolls/Zevon/Replacements?”

EC: 3, bitches.